Let’s Go From Selfie to Selfless in 2018!

Let’s Go From Selfie to Selfless in 2018!

We live in the age of selfies and narcissism. Of course, not everybody is self-involved but it seems that a perfect body and beautiful skin gets us attention, followers, and likes on social media and so why wouldn’t we have the wrong idea?  After all, being self-focused sells!

The problem lies when people begin putting more emphasis on their physical self rather than on the more vital mission of serving and helping others.

I’ll be the first to admit that my body shots on Instagram get FAR more likes than the healthy food and organic strawberry pics, or the inspirational quotes. And if I hadn’t been around the block a few times, I would actually believe that these likes make me important or desired in some way.

The truth is that while admirers are appreciated, we all need to think more deeply about the important underlying message of why we are here. Using your fit body, good looks, or perfect smile to get attention is cool but what are you doing with that audience once you have them?

We are now in a time where authenticity, vulnerability and being of service IS the ONLY way! People are suffering like never before. The depression rate is rising, suicides are up, and numerous people are feeling lost, hopeless, and lacking direction. We can make a difference! We can begin sharing our stories with those around us, talking about our own personal struggles with honesty and heart without the need to appear perfect to the outside world.

By doing this, we not only break down our own walls, but we also let more people in. We communicate on a whole new level when we become raw, relatable, and real.

We’re moving beyond the times of hiding out online and presenting an image of air-brushed flawlessness. Instead we need to dig deep and ask the BIG questions. Why am I here? What can I do to help others? How can my challenges be turned into opportunities to serve? What unique gifts do I have to share with the world?

I’m not saying that we should ditch our regimented diet and fitness routine, laser treatments, or whitening toothpaste, and there is nothing wrong with using your physical qualities to garner accolades and attention, but this year, let’s go deeper than ever before. Let’s use our gifts and talents and appearance wisely and with love.

Something to ask yourself often is “how can I leave this world a better place because I lived?” Once you get the answers, get busy making it happen! After all, none of us know for sure how long we will be here and just imagine what an amazing world it would be if we each did just that. This year, let’s go from selfie to selfless and see what happens.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLIfestyle.com

He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

 

 

What We Can Learn From Denmark, The Happiest Place on Earth

What We Can Learn From Denmark, The Happiest Place on Earth

My parents recently visited me in Los Angeles. They gave me a book called “The Little Book of Hygge” by Meik Wiking which goes into great detail about how the Danish people find happiness through simple life pleasures. Hygge, pronounced HOO-GUH can be translated in different ways but one that resonates most for me is “taking pleasure from the presence of soothing things.” Being Danish myself, I began to contemplate how all of us can bring in more simple pleasures and soothing things into our day to day life in order to get back to basics.

We live busy lives. Los Angeles, although less hectic than New York city for example, holds a fast-paced energy that can often leave us feeling depleted and isolated. I believe there are things we can do to help us slow down and enjoy the simple things in life. Here are some important areas to focus on in order to experience increased happiness, pleasure, and simplicity.

Atmosphere – Our home and our work space is our haven. De-clutter regularly. Light a fragrance free, natural candle, curl up with your cozy, hand-knit blanket, put on your favorite relaxing music, turn down the lights, fill your home with photos and crystals, and freshly cut flowers in unique vases. Take a break from all electronic devices. Use an aromatherapy diffuser and create an atmosphere that feels serene, one that you look forward to spending time in daily.

Pleasure – What brings you pleasure? Perhaps it is freshly ground coffee, dark chocolate, home-baked cookies, steaming cocoa, a soothing bath with herbal oils, petting your dog or cat, taking an evening walk with your loved one, or reading a novel with a cup of tea. Paint, play an instrument, write a poem, or dance around your living room with the kids. Life is meant to be pleasurable. Stop postponing those things that make your heart sing.

Presence – Be here now. Being present is the key to strong and lasting relationships with yourself and others. Turn off your cell phone, remove distractions, listen more carefully, be the kind of friend for others that you want for yourself. Stop and smell the roses. Don’t worry about the future. Stop focusing on the past. Create a spiritual practice of yoga, meditation, chanting, or deep breathing that helps you to get more centered.

Gratitude – What if this is as good as it gets? Take it all in. Give thanks for what is. Make a daily list of what you have to be grateful for. Even the smallest of life’s pleasures can imbue a sense of deep gratitude if you allow them into your heart. It is okay to want more but never take for granted what you already have no matter how trivial it may seem. Sometimes the littlest gifts create the most lasting joy.

Comfort – Relaxation is key. Stop. Get cozy. Stay warm and comfortable. Dress in loose, soft, natural fabrics when you’re lounging at home. Wear handmade wool socks. Take time to curl up and read or watch your favorite romantic movie. Invest in plush pillows. Create your favorite go-to spot in your home to snuggle and hibernate.

Togetherness – While being alone has its benefits, building relationships is equally important. Creating a history with friends and family members and taking time to reflect on fond memories and adventures is the key to lasting fulfillment. Intimacy on all levels helps us to open our hearts and feel connected. Make an effort to book outings with friends and know that there is always room for more cherished, deep connections.

Harmony – Finding harmony and balance is important. Life isn’t a competition. You don’t need to try harder in order for people to like you. There is no need to boast or brag about your accomplishments. You are enough just the way you are. Work to create more balance and ensure that all areas of your life get equal attention.

Truce – Avoid drama. Find relationships that are easy. Don’t get into political debates or stressful conversations but instead take the time to nurture yourself and others. Be gentle, thoughtful, and sensitive to others needs as well as to your own. Remember that you aren’t always right even though your ego would have you believe otherwise.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, the 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

 

 

 

 

What We Think We Want Isn’t Always What We Need

What We Think We Want Isn’t Always What We Need

Have you ever asked or perhaps begged and pleaded the Universe for something that you really wanted? I know that I have.

In fact, most recently I had been doing a lot of that type of thing. Over the past few months I’ve been pitched for numerous television opportunities with big networks. While I have been featured on TV many times over the years, I’ve wanted nothing more than to have my own Television show promoting health and wellness in a larger way.

Fast forward. None of those specific opportunities came to fruition. However, I was offered a unique opportunity to work with a health food company promoting their amazing superfood products. At first I resisted because I knew what was best for me; that was being on TV and not going back into sales.

But as I’ve delved more into helping people by promoting these life-changing products, I quickly realized that in fact, it wasn’t so much the television thing that I yearned for, it was the meaning and purpose and excitement that went along with it. Ironically, that’s what I am getting with this new opportunity. I wanted the satisfaction of being able to help people during my day while feeling productive and that’s exactly what I am doing now, albeit in a different vehicle.

How many of you have an exact image of how your life should be? Do you know precisely what the man or woman of your dreams looks like? Are you set on living in only one neighborhood while doing a specific career? If so, you may be missing out.

While it is good to have a clear vision and goals, that very clarity may also be preventing you from moving forward. When we are so focused on how we think our life should be, we become inflexible to what else is available. We remain too rigid to see that in fact, there are numerous paths to living our dream life. The Universe that we begged and pleaded may have a quicker, easier, and more enjoyable route than we could have even imagined.

What if that very Universe actually knows better than we do? What if we surrendered a little and handed it over? What would life be like if we let go, trusted, and had total faith? What if we said “this or something better?”

I for one could not be happier, more motivated, and fulfilled with my new position. That’s not to say that I won’t be on a regular on television one day soon but if I had not opened myself up to other slivers of possibility, I may have just been clinging onto one vision of how I wanted things to be. I may have missed out on other amazing chances to create a great life in this moment.

This week, I invite you to go inward, tune in, and listen. Pay attention to what is going on around you. Become malleable. Are people offering you incentives, opportunities, and new challenges that you may be turning down? Is the Universe showing you signs that you’re missing because you want it your way?

If you lift and broaden your gaze just a bit, you may begin to see things differently. If you ask for a miracle, expect it to come. Just don’t expect it to look exactly the way you’ve envisioned. Sometimes it will. Sometimes it won’t. As the Rolling Stones wrote in their hit song, “you can’t always get what you want but if you try sometimes, well you might find you get what you need.“

You’re good now. Just wait and see all the abundance that begins pouring in.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert Living in Los Angeles. http://www.jaybradleylifestyle.com

He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!