Life Without Goals – Is It The Way To A Happier Experience?

Life Without Goals – Is It The Way To A Happier Experience?

Lately I’ve been sitting in a place unlike anywhere I’ve been before. I literally live my day-to-day experience without concrete goals, ambitions, or a particular destination in mind. This is the first time in my life where I have “no place to go” and I am surprisingly present and calm.

If you’re like me, you have thrived on pushing yourself towards achieving some type of future vision. You’ve found motivation through mental images of your dream home, the newest model of your favorite sports car, a perfect wedding, or manifesting the ideal physique. Whatever it is, most of us have been taught that desires equal a fulfilling reality. While I’d agree that as humans, we are often energized by new things, anytime we place our happiness in the hands of stuff yet to be accomplished, we are sure to be disappointed, and we may never find ourselves fully present in what is.

So how do we live more in the here and now and will we still attract a good experience if we stop trying? I have always been afraid to take a break from wanting with fear that my life would somehow go backwards, thinking that if I didn’t dream or desire, I’d simply shrivel up and die or at the very least, live some type of mediocre existence.

In fact, the opposite has occurred. I feel more alive than ever! Taking the pressure off to BE SOMEBODY, GET SOMEWHERE, and HAVE MORE STUFF has created an unparalleled presence and joy in THIS moment unlike anything I’ve felt before.

We’ve all heard about allowing enlightenment in through meditation and spiritual practice, and in theory, we understand what this entails. But unless we actually experience it, it’s difficult to grasp what it really means to live in the present.

This may come with age and maturity, and I’m in no way saying that I have mastered it, but when we can just slow down, take a breath, and realize that there is NO PLACE TO GET TO, and that everything outside of us is an illusion of sorts, then we begin to gain the wisdom that is described in ancient texts around the world. Knowing that we are enough just as we are. We are enough with or without our stuff, whether we are single or married, healthy or sick, rich or poor. We are enough because we are here!

Yes, we are physical beings having a spiritual experience and chances are that we will always have dreams of people, places, and things that we want to attract because we desire expansion and growth. But we may also find a time when we can simply allow these new manifestations to show up authentically without pushing or pressuring ourselves or others.

Nothing is more important than that we feel good. When we can sit in such a high vibration, we no longer worry if positive occurrences are ahead, because we understand that like attracts like. Happy attracts happy. Peace attracts more peaceful encounters. And at the end of day, we stop labeling whether something is good or bad anyway.

What would your life be like if you hopped off the hamster wheel? Who would you be if you took time out to truly enjoy the fragrant roses, to be awed by the simple fact that you are here, and without the pressure to move forward? What amazing things would show up for you if you began to live differently?

They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. Are you getting the results you want? Are you happy? Maybe looking for results is the problem.

I’m not suggesting that we merely sit back and halt all action, but when we can fully experience pleasure in what is, then shifts begin to happen naturally and we begin to act from a place of authenticity and alignment with less effort, stress, or strain to achieve.

Maybe, just maybe, it is time to contemplate a new way of being. Letting go. Surrendering. Living with ease. You may be in awe by the magic that begins to show up after releasing the lifetime effort of incessant striving. What would your life be like if you let yourself off the hook, made room for bigger and better things to appear while you’re busy, not being busy?

A life without goals may just bring you heaps of happiness and fulfillment, loftier than you could ever dream.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

Are You Having A Midlife Un-Crisis?

Are You Having A Midlife Un-Crisis?

I am nearing 50 in a matter of months, the time when many people go through a midlife crisis.  Depending upon how long we live, it may occur earlier or later, and for many, we have numerous so-called crisis in our life.

A crisis would be defined as “a time of intense difficulty, trouble, or danger” or “a time when a difficult or important decision must be made.”

I have definitely experienced some major shifts over the past couple of years and much of what I placed importance on no longer has meaning. It has left me questioning everything that I had been working towards in the past. The term crisis may be a bit dramatic, but I for one, most definitely feel an important and life-affirming shift.

If you see things like I do, then you realize that life as we know it, involves constant expansion and growth and the very reason we are here, is to evolve as spiritual beings having this human experience. Therefore, we begin to understand that there is no such thing as crisis. Instead, I now make a declaration for everybody out there who is feeling the effects of such a challenging chapter in their own life, to rename it “Midlife Un-Crisis!”

What are the signs that we may be in such an “Un-Crisis?”

  • Lack of clarity, motivation, or passion for life
  • Feelings of powerlessness or depression
  • Questioning where you want to go from here
  • Wondering why you feel unhappy, stuck, or complacent
  • Recognizing negative, habitual ways of being but not knowing how to move through them
  • Noticing what once made you happy in the past i.e. shopping, eating, sex, or addictive behaviors no longer fulfill you
  • Discovering that what once worked to get you ahead, no longer does
  • You choose happiness over success, money, or accolades

Here is the good news! This doesn’t mean that life is over or that you should give up. It is just the opposite. It’s reflecting back to you, that THE BEST TIMES are yet to come and that all you need to do is make space. This is a time when you don’t need outside stimulus to make you feel alive, when you can actually accomplish more with less striving, and a time when you can allow more joy, fulfillment, and ease into your experience without being so attached to outcome.

It’s the perfect time to Un-Do, Un-Wind, and Un-Tether all those things that no longer serve you. A time to let go of the parts of yourself that you’ve outgrown and moved beyond. Laying just around the corner is something far more valuable and authentic.

It’s okay to question your direction. It is fine to wonder where the heck you’re going and why you’re here. But when we can begin seeing this as a strength and not a weakness, that is where our true power lies.

There may be a midlife questioning about your career or the marriage that you committed to but if you can just love yourself through all of it and learn to be gentle, forgiving, and accepting towards all that is, and stop making yourself wrong for these feelings, then you will soon realize that we really have nothing to fear.

Yes, the inevitable is coming, we are going to die at some point. Many of us fear that more than anything else. Sometimes these painful spots we find ourselves in are derived from that deep-rooted truth we want to avoid, especially as we reach mid-life.

If you can dig deep, do the emotional and spiritual work necessary to get you through to the other side, you’ll begin to see that these times of crisis really are our best teachers and that nothing lasts forever. If we can be patient and loving all while committed to moving through whatever we are dealing with, we will realize that we are having a Midlife Un-Crisis because more is being asked of us, because we are meant to be channels of light for others and because our life is calling for us to become beacons of inspiration, and love.

Don’t give up. Stick with it and begin to unravel why you’re feeling paralyzed, apathetic, or blue. Look for clues. Allow clarity with the help of healers, books, retreats, videos, and a spiritual practice, and you will begin to see that brighter days and a new chapter worth living are just around the corner. If you’re approaching mid-life like I am, the second half really can be your happiest, most fulfilling, and rewarding if you can just ride the wave and have faith.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

Intuition – What Are Your Super Powers?

Intuition – What Are Your Super Powers?

We all have intuition. It is that subtle and quiet voice within us that works to keep us safe, protected, and on track towards living our best life.

What some people don’t realize is that it can speak to us in different ways.

For many people, intuition is also known as a gut feeling that literally sends them a physical sensation in the pit of their stomach. Others have visions spurred by their intuitive voice while many will hear messages.

In order to tune in and allow our intuition to guide us, it’s important for each of us to figure out how it shows up for us in our daily lives.

We all have one main super power that comes in the strongest, while many of us have at least two working for us at all times. Here are the four main ways that our intuition tries to reach us, also known as the intuitive senses:

Clairvoyence – “Clear-seeing” has been referred to as psychic abilities. These people often enjoy visualization, imagining bright colors and specific details and when somebody is speaking to them, they will usually see images or symbols. Clairvoyants tend to learn best by reading or viewing something rather than listening only. They may also receive symbolic messages through their evening dreams.

Clairaudience – Known as “clear-hearing”, these people hear messages. Sometimes it will be a quiet whisper such as a person’s name or the description of a particular item. They are especially attuned to the words in songs and audio. They may enjoy listening over talking and are usually very connected to animals and plants.

Clairsentience – These people known as “clear-feeling” experience an emotional response in their body which is aligned with particular messages. They may get a gut feeling, pressure in the head or other areas of the body and can undergo great anxiety or joy depending upon the situation. Often large crowds can make these people feel unsettled since they pick up on the energies of others rather easily. They are known as empaths.

Claircognizance – “Clear-knowing” people get an inner knowing that something is accurate. If for example, a friend expresses health concerns, the claircognizant will feel an inner confidence that this person will be okay if in fact, the situation is fine. These individuals can often tell very quickly whether or not somebody is being truthful or lying. They are especially sensitive to those who stretch the truth or live in denial.

Our world is shifting dramatically and it’s more important than ever to move into the intuitive way of living. To do this we must put our emotional and spiritual health first, making it a priority on a daily basis. This will be different for everybody but regular yoga, meditation, breath work, chanting, journaling, reading uplifting books, and even creative endeavors such as painting or music will help you to tune in to this powerful and important voice. The more you use it, the more confident you become with its accuracy.

Review the list above and learn about your super powers. Become more and more familiar with the ways in which the Universe is leading you. You’ll soon begin to experience increased happiness, fulfillment, growth, and lasting success.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

New People – The Key to Opportunity, Growth and Change!

New People – The Key to Opportunity, Growth and Change!

I’ll be the first to admit that while I enjoy having great friends and a busy social life, I can be a bit of a homebody too. I’m both extroverted and introverted at the same time. I love routine, alone time, and structure and sometimes it’s hard to put myself out there to interact. This is partly because I am very sensitive to other’s energy and often I find myself drained when I’m around people who aren’t present or with those who are self-involved. Maybe you can relate?

What I’ve learned however is that new people in our lives bring with them, new opportunities and growth. And while it is essential to have long-standing relationships and friendships along with quality time in solitude, it is equally imperative not to grow stagnant or to cut yourself off from new energy.

If your job or lifestyle forces you to be around new people, then in many ways you are naturally keeping this flow going. But if you work from home or your job involves being in solitude, it is vital that you push yourself outside of your comfort zone regularly in order to broaden your circle of influence.

Much research has been done to show that those with a strong and significant support system tend to live longer lives so this is particularly important for those interested in health and longevity.

It is said that we become like the people we surround ourselves with the most. Look around. Do you want to be like those with whom you spend the most time or are you ready to bring in new folks who are more aligned with your bigger vision? Do you have kind and giving individuals in your circle? If you’re looking to become more successful and prosperous, are you surrounding yourself with affluent people? If your desire is to open up spiritually and emotionally, are those around you doing the same?

By paying attention to our day-to-day communications and to how we feel when we are with those we see regularly, we can begin to observe patterns. Do those very people lift us up or drain our life force? Do they offer us love, acceptance, and inspiration or do they judge us and dim our light? Are they jealous and competitive or do they wish us only success and happiness? The answers may tell us that it’s time to make some changes.

Bringing in new friends doesn’t have to be complicated. I have moved from city to city numerous times and I’ve learned to adapt. What I have noticed is that there are opportunities to meet new people each day. The best way is by doing more of what you love. If you don’t enjoy networking events for example, take a class or join a group doing something that excites you. Make a goal of trying something new every month whether it is a painting class, hiking group, or book club. What about the neighbors that you greet on the elevator each morning or those you see at the gym? Each one represents a possible new connection with a meaningful outcome. If we want something to shift, we need to shift also. Try shaking things up a little bit and push yourself into new territory. Say hello, invite somebody for coffee, or give a compliment. Break the ice and often you may be surprised to see that it opens the door for amazing new individuals who bring with them a bounty of renewed vigor, ideas, connections, and inspiration.

Keep a healthy balance of old and new friends and always maintain a solid foundation with those who offer you grounding and unconditional support. But also remember to branch out and allow new people who can assist you in your elevated path. A new person equals new energy, growth, opportunity, and insight that can change your life forever.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert Living in Los Angeles http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

Two Ears and One Mouth, Use Them Accordingly

Two Ears and One Mouth, Use Them Accordingly

We’ve all heard this saying before. The reason that we have two ears and one mouth is so that we can listen more than we talk.

Unfortunately, in this world where many have become self-obsessed or just plain busy, we seem to have forgotten the valuable art of listening. Instead, as you may have experienced personally, we go from party-to-party, coffee date-to-coffee date, and meeting-to-meeting feeling completely unheard and unseen. Many of us have discovered a shift in how people are communicating or should I say, not communicating. If you’re sensitive to people’s energy like I am, you may feel overwhelmed or drained by others doing too much talking and not enough listening.

In this world of social media frenzy and instant gratification, we don’t communicate the way we used to. In fact, making a personal phone call or having a face-to-face chat has become almost passé. People spend much more time texting, on Instagram, Facebook, or Snapchat then having an intimate conversation.

Because of this, people are feeling lonelier than ever before. A time has come when we must make important shifts towards getting back to basics. And to start, that means learning to listen. I mean, TRULY listen.

Being present isn’t always easy especially with so many distractions. These days we are bombarded by everything from our iPhones to shiny billboards so it’s no wonder people aren’t communicating. We have forgotten how. Spending time with somebody doesn’t mean what it used to. Instead it’s common to see two or three friends at dinner all on their cell phones with heads down to their screens.

I am writing this article as a reminder and to bring awareness. It is time for all of us to become more conscious. There is an epidemic of lack of focus, patience, and presence that has never been seen before. And it is only getting worse. But we can begin to make positive changes today.

Awareness

Awareness is the key. Simply being aware that you aren’t aware is the first step. When we become conscious of a negative pattern that we keep repeating, we can then step up and change it. Once we recognize that something is no longer serving others, or us we can begin to reprogram our minds and our negative habits.

Listening

As difficult as it may be, we need to force ourselves to be present with others. We must make ourselves listen intently without distractions. When we have private time with friends or if we’re at a party and somebody is telling us a story, we owe them the honor of being heard. And vice versa when it’s our turn to speak. True listening doesn’t mean interrupting and going into a personal experience that is similar but instead it means standing firm, being quiet, and simply taking it all in. Often people don’t even want our opinion, they simply need somebody to listen. Their desire is to feel acknowledged and heard.

Practice

Just like anything that we aim to master, practice makes perfect. Once we become aware of where we need to improve, and we put it into practice, we then begin to work on shifting things for good. We practice not picking up our phone during a dinner with family or while your child is telling you about their day at school. We make it a point to schedule more time with our friends rather than simply texting or instant messaging on Facebook. We plan a walk or workout without bringing our cell phone.

It won’t be easy at first but as we change things up, it will become more and more of our natural way of being. We’ll begin to remember what it’s like to be present, living life the way’s it’s meant to be lived. We’ll begin enjoying the small pleasures of connecting with people around us in a deeper and more meaningful way.

We have two ears and one mouth, let’s use them accordingly.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert living in Los Angeles.

http://www.jaybradleylifestyle.com

He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL The 12-Week guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!