Life’s Lessons To Make Us Stronger

Life’s Lessons To Make Us Stronger

Have you ever noticed that even when you’re doing well, life seems to test you? Do you ever sense that some invisible energy pushes you towards challenges and says “oh yea, you’re feeling good? Let’s see about that.”

While I believe that the world is a friendly place and that we are meant for joy and ease, I also suspect that we are here primarily to grow and evolve as spiritual beings, sometimes more than we we’d care to. We understand on some level that the Universe has our back but that it also directs us to be our best possible version even when we want to yell “NO, I am JUST FINE the way I am THANK YOU!”

If you regularly feel lured into a space that’s uncomfortable or areas where you thought you had it all worked out, you’re not alone. Many of us are being opened up so that we can finally release old patterns and live our best life. Often that process can be painful and disheartening.

The biggest challenge for most people comes down to self-love and self-acceptance. At our core, many of us feel unworthy. In turn, we tend to attract people and circumstances that exemplify this. While what seems like an undesirable and repetitive cycle, is actually an amazing opportunity to expand. We can learn from these lessons and finally move beyond the lower vibration and personal limitations.

If you’ve tended to attract lousy partners, failures at work, struggles financially, or ongoing health issues for example, the job is to figure out what our role is in the situation and then begin making a conscious effort to move beyond attracting the same experiences over and over again.

Instead of beating ourselves up however, there comes a quiet acknowledgement of what isn’t working and then little by little, we can begin designing a new future that is not created from old paradigms running the show.

Yes bad things can happen even when we do our best but if we begin seeing the Universe as a friendly place instead of feeling victimized, we gradually regain personal power even when times are tough and when it seems the world is against us.

If we can reconnect and charge our spiritual batteries daily by practicing self-love, self-acceptance, and self-forgiveness, we will begin to relax and our viewpoint of what’s good and bad, or right and wrong will shift into a knowing that all is well no matter what. It really is.

Sometimes life can be challenging and there are many days when we just want the lessons to stop. Decide once and for all to release the resistance and not to take things so seriously. Welcome the obstacle with open arms and step outside of your experience to see it for what it truly is…the chance to rise above and to embrace all that is.

Even when it feels like we aren’t making progress, we are! Day by day, step by step, we’re moving into a whole new and expansive space. Hang in there, you’re going to be just fine.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

Consistency – The Key To Long-Lasting Balance, Self-Respect, And Joy

Consistency – The Key To Long-Lasting Balance, Self-Respect, And Joy

People often ask me how I stay so fit on an ongoing basis and my answer is always the same; consistency. I started working out at the age of 13 and have missed no more than two weeks in a row for the past 35 years. I don’t say this to brag or boast but instead to emphasize the importance of being consistent. I for one, would probably have quit my fitness routine years ago if I took long breaks in between or let it slip for too long.

Anything in our life is easier to maintain if we keep it as a regular practice. Literally scheduling time for everything that is important to you is not only necessary, it is the only way to accomplish what you set out to complete.

Regardless of what it is, from keeping your house clean and tidy, to meditating, or fine-tuning a hobby, to staying healthy, everything must be carried out with consistency in order to be your best.

When we put ourselves first along with all that we deem important, we not only keep momentum, but we also gain a sense of pride, self-love, and confidence that we have what it takes to get things done.

Those who self-sabotage tend to habitually let their good habits slide only to beat themselves up afterwards in a repetitive, downward cycle. While nobody is perfect, and I for one, have definitely struggled with consistency in areas other than my health, here are some steps to consider which may help to keep you on track:

  • Do A Little Bit Each Day– When it comes to staying organized and on top of things, do little things each day rather than waiting for it to pile up. Staying organized means putting receipts and clutter away on a daily basis instead of once per month for example.
  • Schedule It In– Literally, schedule it all in. Get an old-fashioned day-planner if necessary and write things down. Book specific times during your day with to-do lists but ensure that you also keep space open for fun, leisure, and spontaneity too.
  • Find Your Why– This is especially important when it comes to fitness. Your why is your burning desire. Why is it important to stay fit? Why do you want to lose weight, gain muscle, or stay active? Dig deep and find the underlying meaning behind everything that you do. Sometimes looking good in the mirror or getting a hot date is enough motivation to make it stick.
  • Put Yourself First– Things won’t get done in your life if you always place others needs before your own. Are you constantly going out of your way to help people while letting your own values fall to the wayside? It’s okay to be selfish! It’s okay to love yourself enough and to place importance on all the things that you value, ensuring that you make consistent space for it.
  • Healthy Boundaries– Sometimes we overdo things. Know when it’s time to say enough to work, family, friends, and obligations so that you have more than ample energy to give back to yourself. Balance is key here and only you will know where to draw the line and set healthy boundaries.
  • Give Something Up – Sometimes you’ll need to watch less TV or reduce your time on Instagram if you really want to achieve more in your life. Make a list of all the things that are important to you and those which you intend to focus on. Then, set out to get them done daily or weekly depending on what it is. If this means giving some things up that have less importance, do it! You may even find that this is the kick you’ve been looking for to finally create a change that you so desperately desire.

Each of us has some areas where it’s easier to remain consistent than others, we are human after all. With a little attention, conscious effort, and practice, you will begin to find more balance, joy, self-respect, and pride in how you live your life and the direction that you are headed.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLIfestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

 

 

 

Life Without Goals – Is It The Way To A Happier Experience?

Life Without Goals – Is It The Way To A Happier Experience?

Lately I’ve been sitting in a place unlike anywhere I’ve been before. I literally live my day-to-day experience without concrete goals, ambitions, or a particular destination in mind. This is the first time in my life where I have “no place to go” and I am surprisingly present and calm.

If you’re like me, you have thrived on pushing yourself towards achieving some type of future vision. You’ve found motivation through mental images of your dream home, the newest model of your favorite sports car, a perfect wedding, or manifesting the ideal physique. Whatever it is, most of us have been taught that desires equal a fulfilling reality. While I’d agree that as humans, we are often energized by new things, anytime we place our happiness in the hands of stuff yet to be accomplished, we are sure to be disappointed, and we may never find ourselves fully present in what is.

So how do we live more in the here and now and will we still attract a good experience if we stop trying? I have always been afraid to take a break from wanting with fear that my life would somehow go backwards, thinking that if I didn’t dream or desire, I’d simply shrivel up and die or at the very least, live some type of mediocre existence.

In fact, the opposite has occurred. I feel more alive than ever! Taking the pressure off to BE SOMEBODY, GET SOMEWHERE, and HAVE MORE STUFF has created an unparalleled presence and joy in THIS moment unlike anything I’ve felt before.

We’ve all heard about allowing enlightenment in through meditation and spiritual practice, and in theory, we understand what this entails. But unless we actually experience it, it’s difficult to grasp what it really means to live in the present.

This may come with age and maturity, and I’m in no way saying that I have mastered it, but when we can just slow down, take a breath, and realize that there is NO PLACE TO GET TO, and that everything outside of us is an illusion of sorts, then we begin to gain the wisdom that is described in ancient texts around the world. Knowing that we are enough just as we are. We are enough with or without our stuff, whether we are single or married, healthy or sick, rich or poor. We are enough because we are here!

Yes, we are physical beings having a spiritual experience and chances are that we will always have dreams of people, places, and things that we want to attract because we desire expansion and growth. But we may also find a time when we can simply allow these new manifestations to show up authentically without pushing or pressuring ourselves or others.

Nothing is more important than that we feel good. When we can sit in such a high vibration, we no longer worry if positive occurrences are ahead, because we understand that like attracts like. Happy attracts happy. Peace attracts more peaceful encounters. And at the end of day, we stop labeling whether something is good or bad anyway.

What would your life be like if you hopped off the hamster wheel? Who would you be if you took time out to truly enjoy the fragrant roses, to be awed by the simple fact that you are here, and without the pressure to move forward? What amazing things would show up for you if you began to live differently?

They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. Are you getting the results you want? Are you happy? Maybe looking for results is the problem.

I’m not suggesting that we merely sit back and halt all action, but when we can fully experience pleasure in what is, then shifts begin to happen naturally and we begin to act from a place of authenticity and alignment with less effort, stress, or strain to achieve.

Maybe, just maybe, it is time to contemplate a new way of being. Letting go. Surrendering. Living with ease. You may be in awe by the magic that begins to show up after releasing the lifetime effort of incessant striving. What would your life be like if you let yourself off the hook, made room for bigger and better things to appear while you’re busy, not being busy?

A life without goals may just bring you heaps of happiness and fulfillment, loftier than you could ever dream.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

The Voice Of The Bully – Are YOU Your Worst Critic?

The Voice Of The Bully – Are YOU Your Worst Critic?

Most of us have been bullied. It often happens during our adolescent and teenage years and can take form in both verbal and physical abuse. I was bullied from kindergarten all the way through high school so I can certainly relate all too well.

The tormentor that I want to bring light to today is that of our inner bully. The voice of sabotage, put downs, and painful, recurring messages that we direct toward ourselves.

Ironically, we learn early on from other bullies, one of two things; To either accept their cruelty as truth, or if we have enough strength and self-respect from a young age, to repel their destructive messages. Unfortunately, many of us take these mean and degrading words to heart and we begin to use them as weapons against ourselves.

Constant abuse of any kind can eventually play with our minds and cause us to go into a downward spiral of negative, habitual self-talk. Even with plenty of positive tapes playing in the background, the frequent, underlying message is that “we are not enough.”

So how do we stop the influence of our bully, making way for more happiness, success, and self-esteem?

  • Recognize The Voice– Become clear that there is, in fact, a voice that is getting in the way. Begin to see patterns in your thoughts, actions, and inner dialogue that makes you feel bad. Listen to those voices but don’t buy into them. Start to recognize how you bully yourself and put yourself down on an ongoing basis.
  • Don’t Believe it– The next step is to STOP believing these messages. The routine we have fallen into is a toxic pattern of self-abuse and it has to stop! Begin separating yourself from the negativity and understand that it isn’t the voice of truth or reason. It is simply negative programming.
  • Befriend The Bully– Make friends with the bully. Hear what they have to say. Get sensible and send the tyrant gentleness. Like all bullies in our life, all they really need is recognition and love. What we resist, persists. What we love and forgive, dissipates.
  • Practice Feeling– Pay close attention to how you feel. What thoughts and words empower and energize you? Which ones drain you and make you feel tired or sad? Eventually, with a little practice, you WILL be able to create a new pattern of positivity, self-love, and becoming your own best friend and support system.
  • Spend Time Being Confident – Extend more energy doing those things that make you feel confident. If you constantly push yourself into areas that make you anxious and insecure, it’s fine to a point because it causes you to grow, but make sure that you are also doing many things that you’re great at! Somebody with low self-worth tends to continue patterns that emphasize their feelings of lack. Shift gears, you ARE amazing at many things! Start doing them more often.
  • Re-Charge– Continually re-charge your emotional and spiritual batteries. Create a daily practice that keeps you plugged in. Pray, meditate, journal, do yoga, read uplifting books, sing, get creative, and do whatever it takes to keep you balanced and open-hearted. With consistency, you will keep your batteries from becoming dangerously low and therefore avoiding the fall back into old patterns.

From somebody who has lived most of my life feeling unworthy due to early programming, I can tell you that THERE IS HOPE! It will take some consistent effort on your part but if you keep on, keeping on, you will most definitely make positive strides in the direction of regaining your natural state…that of confidence, self-love, worthiness, and a knowing that you are enough just as you are!

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

Surrender – The Ultimate Test of Faith

Surrender – The Ultimate Test of Faith

Many of us have read self-help books that talk about surrendering and letting go as a way of de-stressing and stopping our need to control every aspect of life. By digging deep and finding an inner faith that everything will be okay, we are more able to relax and live with joy and ease.

Sometimes, this is easier said than done. Especially if you’ve explored the law of attraction like I have, which teaches us that thoughts become things, therefore often causing us added pressure to keep our mind aligned and disciplined.  Ironically, this takes us further away from simply letting go.

Then what is true surrender? How can we incorporate it into our lives so that it isn’t just a theory but an actual way of being?

For me, it has taken years to truly understand letting go and trusting. It’s easy for us to doubt ourselves or to question whether or not we are on the right path or if we’ve made smart choices along the way.

But here are some simple ways to open up to a more surrendered life. Practice these and you’ll be well on your way to a serene and happy way of being:

  • Look Back– If you’re stressed or worried about a particular area of your life, just look back onto past events that brought you similar angst and recall what the outcome was. Most often, it ended positively without major drama. We mostly fear things that will never come to fruition so with each similar experience that pops up, we should be able to let go more each time without anticipating the worst. Practice makes perfect. Be careful not to spend too much time in the past however, as it can rehash stuff that no longer serves us.
  • Stop Planning – Most people need to set goals and make plans to stay on track. This isn’t a bad idea but be careful not to spend too much time focused on future events or we miss the magic of today. Work on setting intentions and visions for your future but then let go fully and completely. Have faith that the Universe has heard your wishes and that it doesn’t need constant reminders in order to fulfill those very things. Again, trust and let go.
  • Create Space– Each of us requires daily, quiet, reflective time. We need to go inward and tune in to what that quiet voice of intuition is telling us. When we can get still and learn to trust our gut reactions, we will begin to rely on it as our friendly confidant that never steers us wrong. Start focusing more on living from a still and centered way of being rather than from one of analysis. Create mental and spiritual space within.
  • Stop Reacting– There comes a time in our life when we must stop being a victim, reacting to our life’s events. What if there was a higher power guiding us and it had more wisdom than we did? What if we could totally let go and be led somewhere far greater than we even imagined? Stress begets stress. Let’s work on reacting less and easing into whatever is happening in this moment with trust and faith.
  • Calming Herbs – Most of us are programmed from a young age to look at the worst case scenario. This intensifies our fight or flight reactions causing only more upset. Try herbs like Ashwaganda, Rhodiola, and Maca to boost energy while lowering the stress hormone cortisol. Chamomile, Kava kava, Valerian, and Lemon Balm along with Sun Theanine and Gamma Amino Butyric (GABA) also work very well to soothe the body and mind and lessen anxiety.
  • Have Fun – When we can remember to enjoy life, celebrate with friends, and do things that feed our inner child, we immediately begin to let go and live more in the moment. When we are fully present, we are totally surrendered. Having fun and planning outings each week will absolutely help you to relax, release, and regain balance.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.om

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!