The very topic that causes so many of us stress and anxiety can on the flip side, also bring much joy and empowerment. So how do we find a balance between making sure that it doesn’t control us while still ensuring that we have enough?
I haven’t always been the best money manager. In fact, it has been a pain in my ass for most of my life. I was the guy who was always over-extended because I truly believed that more was coming. I was most often worried and tense, while dreaming up ways to earn more. Money took me out of the present moment into either the past or future. I would fear repeating old cycles or anxious that I would run out and go broke.
When we come from lack in any situation in our life, we simply attract more lack. The key to achieving a healthy relationship with money I’ve learned, is the same as any other topic in our life. We must learn to love it, remove all blocks in the receiving of it, live in the present, and find a balance between responsibility while still envisioning and trusting that more is coming.
We already understand the negative effects of stress on our health. Whether it be relationship woes, job challenges, or debt, stress is stress. It is so important that we learn to view money, income, finances, investments, spending, and every aspect of money in a new way, one that helps us to relax and see it for what it truly is.
The topic of money is quite complex and too lengthy for one article, especially for those who might be embroiled in old ancestral and family beliefs on the topic. But here are some helpful tips to get you on track towards living a more abundant and prosperous life:
- Learn to Love it– if we detest anything, we only perpetuate that negative feeling. We need to fall in love with the topic of money and remove all resistance attached to it. We need to nurture it, respect it, and treat it with kindness.
- Get Serious– While dreaming of more affluence, setting positive intentions, and creating a vision board is great, in order for more to come in, we must also get serious about where we are currently at financially. Finding that balance between looking at the numbers while still opening up for more is key. Living in reality with what is while still opening the channels for more to come in is vital.
- Better Feeling Thoughts– Always reach for the better feeling thought about money. If you’re stressed or angry about your situation, find visuals, meditations, or what-if scenarios that bring you a sense of ease. Spend more time focusing on thoughts that bring you better feeling emotions. You may not be ready to feel joy on the topic of money, but you can at least reach for the feeling of relief. Eventually thoughts become things which is why it’s imperative to create better feeling thoughts along the way.
- Money is an Illusion– We place so much importance on our financial situation and it makes sense since living well costs money. But when we look at it from a spiritual sense, that money is simply energy and that we are spiritual beings having a physical experience, then we can learn to lower the resistance that money creates. We must stop making it the most important aspect and instead learn to focus on the other areas of our life also.
- Gratitude– As tough as it can be when things are tight, we MUST find gratitude. Focus on all that you have to be grateful for even if it is the smallest of things like the hummingbird outside of your window, your strong body, or the awesome friends that surround you. When we give thanks for things other than money, we begin increasing our positive energy in all areas which tends to bring more magic in the financial areas as well.
- Hire an Expert– Find somebody who has mastered money. Not just an investment advisor, but one who has truly found what you are looking for. Look for a teacher who’s message resonates and who is living the life that you respect and look up to. Don’t be afraid to speak with investor advisors too as long as they aren’t fear based and so long as it doesn’t cause you to fall back into panic mode. Again, balance is the key.
- Spend Less Than you Earn – This may seem obvious but for those who live by the law of attraction and who believe that wealth is on its way, it can be easy to overspend or live beyond our current means. The dream of “one day I’ll have it all” is awesome but if we can’t learn to manage smaller amounts, then we probably won’t be able to handle a large sum when it does come. Do yourself a favor and find ways to either increase your income or to decrease your monthly expenses. It may only be temporary, but you’ll feel better in the process and it will reduce the resistance and increase your overall flow.
- Ho-Oponopono– This awesome Hawaiian healing technique works miraculously well. Simply think about all areas of your finances, your debt, income, credit cards, bank accounts, and also your lenders…and begin repeating out loud or to yourself “I Love You, I’m Sorry, Please Forgive Me, Thank You.” These phrases help to clean the situation and allow us to take our part in all aspects of our money situation. The good, bad, and the ugly. You will notice energetic shifts under the surface and eventually positive physical changes will occur as well.
- Forgive Yourself– We are so hard on ourselves. Use Ho-Oponopono and send yourself love and forgiveness too. You have done your best. Stop beating yourself up and make a commitment to being gentle on YOU! Know that we are never going to perfect life and that we are simply students here. Learn what you can and for goodness sake, love yourself fully and completely regardless of where you are at.
Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com
He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!
Every one of us has made new year’s resolutions at some point in our lives. Many of us have kept them but all too often, let’s face it, they’re left behind somewhere by February or March because we’re too busy and have lost the incentive to follow through.
But what’s really going on below the surface is that our subconscious mind is sabotaging our success. Whether we want to lose 10 pounds, earn more money, spend less, or meet the mate of our dreams, what we desire in our conscious minds means very little if our subconscious is running the show.
We get messages early on in our lives about important topics such as money, love, and sex for example. We’re taught by our parents and other influential adults how to navigate these areas of our life. We learn by example and what we see and hear sets up these beliefs at an early age. It ends up that no matter what we want on the outside as grown-ups, these often-limiting attitudes take over causing continual broken dreams and disappointments.
So, how can we stop this from happening once and for all? How can we finally keep our resolutions instead of hitting the wall yet again and feeling the ongoing sense of failure and frustration?
Get to the Bottom of it – For each resolution, make a list of the top 5 negative thoughts that come to mind. For example, if you’d like to earn and save more money, journal about your feelings on the topic such as “if I make additional income, I’ll have to work harder and never see my friends” or “if I budget, then I’ll constantly be stressed and anxious and not enjoy my life.” Whatever comes up, it is time to get it out and into the open for healing. Write down the contradictory feelings on each topic that are getting in the way.
Seek Help – Once you’ve uncovered your subconscious beliefs that are blocking your forward movement, seek an expert who can help. Find a therapist, hypnotist, healer, or coach who can help you move through these old, unhealthy patterns in order to let them go once and for all. Change is possible! Make this the year that you finally break free.
Make a Plan – If you set goals for the new year then you must also make a plan. Nothing will get accomplished if you just wish for it. It doesn’t need to be an overwhelming process but you must work backwards from your long-term goal or resolution, breaking it up into smaller and more achievable steps. Start with the outcome you’d like in one year and then create actions for the month, week, and each day in order to succeed.
Be Accountable – Make sure to check in regularly. How far are you coming along with your goals? Find somebody who you can be accountable to, perhaps an accountability partner who is also looking to keep their resolutions. Set up regular weekly or monthly meetings and do it as a team. If you’ve bitten off more than you can chew, go back and re-evaluate and perhaps set more attainable steps for you to take.
Celebrate Your Wins – Take time to celebrate your accomplishments! Too many times we sail through our successes without truly acknowledging and appreciating them. When we have big goals it’s easy to overlook the small wins along the way. Give thanks, soak in the gratitude, and be more present to enjoy even the smallest of victories.
Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com
He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!
This article was prompted by a particularly slow month. August didn’t hold a lot of work commitments for me, and what normally would have stressed me out caused a complete shift in perspective. Let me explain.
I grew up in a family where my dad was a go-getter. He started a very successful business that developed into employing over 100 people and created a small empire. I watched him carefully and learned that hard work equals great success.
Because of this, I always had drive and motivation but I chose a very different path then my father. I became a model and actor from a young age and developed my creativity over my business side. Nobody had prepared me for how this was supposed to look or feel. How do I merge success, business, and creativity? Much trial and error led me to finding some success along the way and eventually guided me to where I am today.
I have learned to combine my writing, speaking, coaching, and business skills into my current career as a health, wellness and lifestyle advisor and author. But deep down there was still, until this month anyway, an uncertainty as to how to deal with the down times.
My normal reaction when things got slow was to “get busy and make something happen” but this month I decided to rest, relax, and to simply be. I still worked out at the gym and kept regular commitments but I meditated more and took quiet time to sleep and contemplate. And while income was down, the most amazing things began to happen. People, opportunities, and synchronicities showed up that I would have never expected. In my stillness, I learned to “allow” rather than to “create.”
As a go-getter myself, this was NOT easy. My normal instincts are to stay active, plan, goal set, and to DO! But if you’re like me you’ll agree that this constant action mode can get exhausting! And, in all honesty, it hasn’t led to the ultimate success that I would have liked. So I decided to try something different. When we change the way we look at things, the things around us change and I have been ready for that change for quite some time.
To my surprise, one miracle after the other began to show up into my life this month from me doing virtually nothing.
Am I suggesting that you just sit, sleep, and meditate your way through life? Of course not. But there may be times when that is the absolute best approach possible. In between chapters is a great time to relax. In fact, learning to surrender and only act when you are inspired to do so, IS, I am learning, the only way to be. It offers us the ability to be more focused on the now and to be present in the joy that surrounds us rather than being busy just for the sake of it.
So the next time you find yourself down, bored, or you simply have a lull in your work schedule, acknowledge that perhaps it’s happening to provide you an amazing opportunity. Maybe it will deliver new things into your life that are even better than you could have ever imagined! And perhaps it’s teaching you a new way to live that taps into the Universal truth that you will ALWAYS be provided for. Learning the amazing art of doing nothing may actually be the answer you’ve been waiting for.
Jay Bradley is an Anti-aging, wellness & lifestyle expert living in Los Angeles.
He is the best-selling author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!
We’ve all felt down from time to time. Emotions are an integral part of what makes us human. Sometimes the low times can magnify the ups, so they’re not always that bad.
I have struggled with bouts of depression throughout my life. It began from a young age and has carried into my adult years. However, I have learned how to cope by taking great care of my physical health, doing the inner spiritual work and by being innately aware of what is going on with my thought process. But depression is a disease and sometimes it’s difficult to figure out when we are truly and chemically depressed versus feeling down because of outside circumstances or events.
This happens a lot during holidays such as Thanksgiving and Christmas. Holidays, while supposedly fun and social, can also bring out deep-routed sadness. There are a multitude of reasons we get down with too much spending, family dynamics, and overall fatigue from lack of sleep or overeating topping the list.
Of course, always seek professional help if your depression lasts for extended periods or if you are unable to cope with day-to-day activities.
If you suspect your low mood is due to an external source such as the holidays, here are some useful tips to get you through it while minimizing possible depression and feelings of being overwhelmed:
- Reduce Sugar
This is a tough one especially during the holidays but sugar is a known depressant. Desserts and alcohol while initially causing a high, will lead to an ultimate crash in blood sugar, insulin levels, and overall energy. Allow yourself to binge a little bit during the holidays but know when to say enough is enough. Don’t feel the pressure to eat everything on your plate and drink one glass of water or soda between every alcoholic beverage to offset its effects. If something doesn’t tantalize your taste buds, don’t finish it.
- Find a Friend
Being around family for extended periods can bring out a lot of stuff from our past. Emotions can run high and toxic memories that we hold deep seem to surface quickly during the holidays. If you’re feeling emotional or drained, find a good friend to talk to. Decompress with somebody who knows you well and can remind you that you are in fact, sane, wonderful, and balanced and that family can bring out our worst. Friends can act as a therapist when we need them the most.
- Take a Time Out
Creating a morning practice is something that I recommend to all of my clients and friends. Journaling, prayer, meditation, and reading uplifting material every day, WILL change your life and your mood. It’s more important than ever to continue carving out this time during the holidays. Even if you have to get up 15 minutes early, it’s worth the commitment. This solo time will create a haven for you where you can get centered before the craziness begins.
- Watch Your Wallet
If you’re a giver, then this definitely applies to you. Many of us feel pressured to buy extravagant gifts during the holidays especially if others have done the same for us. Take the time to write down how much money you have for gifts (if any at all) and then create a budget for yourself. Carry it with you while you’re shopping and take notes in order to stay on track. Remember, the size or price of our gift in NO WAY reflects our love for somebody. A beautiful card with sincere words goes a long way, often meaning much more to others then a present. Don’t feel the pressure to give back. If you don’t have the money for gifts, learn to receive without the stress of having to return the favor. Those who truly matter will understand.
- Keep Up with Exercise
It’s totally fine to take a short break from your exercise routine during the holidays but don’t go too long. The longer you’re away, the more difficult it is to return. Also, exercise creates endorphins, which are the “feel good” hormone. They are more important than ever for those who are prone to depression. Push yourself to do short, high-intensity interval training (HIIT) which takes less time but with better results. HIIT also acts as a wonderful detox from sugar and alcohol.
- Learn to say NO
So many parties, so little time! It’s easy to get caught up wanting to be social and to visit with all of your favorite people. You must learn that it is okay to say no. If you’re not a “hell yes” to an event, party, or get together, consider turning it down with a polite response. People who love you will not take it personally. It is always best to put yourself first because if we are drained and feeling down, we have nothing left to offer others.