Life Without Goals – Is It The Way To A Happier Experience?

Life Without Goals – Is It The Way To A Happier Experience?

Lately I’ve been sitting in a place unlike anywhere I’ve been before. I literally live my day-to-day experience without concrete goals, ambitions, or a particular destination in mind. This is the first time in my life where I have “no place to go” and I am surprisingly present and calm.

If you’re like me, you have thrived on pushing yourself towards achieving some type of future vision. You’ve found motivation through mental images of your dream home, the newest model of your favorite sports car, a perfect wedding, or manifesting the ideal physique. Whatever it is, most of us have been taught that desires equal a fulfilling reality. While I’d agree that as humans, we are often energized by new things, anytime we place our happiness in the hands of stuff yet to be accomplished, we are sure to be disappointed, and we may never find ourselves fully present in what is.

So how do we live more in the here and now and will we still attract a good experience if we stop trying? I have always been afraid to take a break from wanting with fear that my life would somehow go backwards, thinking that if I didn’t dream or desire, I’d simply shrivel up and die or at the very least, live some type of mediocre existence.

In fact, the opposite has occurred. I feel more alive than ever! Taking the pressure off to BE SOMEBODY, GET SOMEWHERE, and HAVE MORE STUFF has created an unparalleled presence and joy in THIS moment unlike anything I’ve felt before.

We’ve all heard about allowing enlightenment in through meditation and spiritual practice, and in theory, we understand what this entails. But unless we actually experience it, it’s difficult to grasp what it really means to live in the present.

This may come with age and maturity, and I’m in no way saying that I have mastered it, but when we can just slow down, take a breath, and realize that there is NO PLACE TO GET TO, and that everything outside of us is an illusion of sorts, then we begin to gain the wisdom that is described in ancient texts around the world. Knowing that we are enough just as we are. We are enough with or without our stuff, whether we are single or married, healthy or sick, rich or poor. We are enough because we are here!

Yes, we are physical beings having a spiritual experience and chances are that we will always have dreams of people, places, and things that we want to attract because we desire expansion and growth. But we may also find a time when we can simply allow these new manifestations to show up authentically without pushing or pressuring ourselves or others.

Nothing is more important than that we feel good. When we can sit in such a high vibration, we no longer worry if positive occurrences are ahead, because we understand that like attracts like. Happy attracts happy. Peace attracts more peaceful encounters. And at the end of day, we stop labeling whether something is good or bad anyway.

What would your life be like if you hopped off the hamster wheel? Who would you be if you took time out to truly enjoy the fragrant roses, to be awed by the simple fact that you are here, and without the pressure to move forward? What amazing things would show up for you if you began to live differently?

They say insanity is doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result. Are you getting the results you want? Are you happy? Maybe looking for results is the problem.

I’m not suggesting that we merely sit back and halt all action, but when we can fully experience pleasure in what is, then shifts begin to happen naturally and we begin to act from a place of authenticity and alignment with less effort, stress, or strain to achieve.

Maybe, just maybe, it is time to contemplate a new way of being. Letting go. Surrendering. Living with ease. You may be in awe by the magic that begins to show up after releasing the lifetime effort of incessant striving. What would your life be like if you let yourself off the hook, made room for bigger and better things to appear while you’re busy, not being busy?

A life without goals may just bring you heaps of happiness and fulfillment, loftier than you could ever dream.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

Heal All Areas of Your Life With Ho’Oponopono

Heal All Areas of Your Life With Ho’Oponopono

Ho’Oponopono is a Hawaiian healing technique based upon love and forgiveness. Loosely translated, it means “correction” and the basis of this practice is to take full responsibility for everything and everyone in your life.

The method involves repeating four phrases over and over again either out loud or to yourself. “I Love You,” I’m Sorry,” Please Forgive Me,” and “Thank You.”

The first phrase is about repentance, next forgiveness, then gratitude and finally love. By sending Ho’Oponopono to a person, object, or emotion, for example, we learn to take full responsibility for its presence in our life and we gently let it go by first acknowledging our part in the situation or event, and then releasing it through love and appreciation.

I use Ho’Oponopono in my transformational breath sessions because it is the most powerful way that I know to release heavy or toxic emotions, energy, and resentment. At the end of each class, I have the participants send these four healing phrases to themselves in present day, their inner child, parents and anyone else that they feel needs their love and forgiveness. I always say that it’s often the people we least want to forgive, that we need to forgive the most.

You can try the practice while reading this article. Take a moment now and think about somebody or something in your life that you resent, detest, or have undesirable emotions towards. It can be a person or situation. Since everything is made up of energy, even sending Ho’oponopono to money, an ailing organ, or a family event will work. Picture that person or thing and gently repeat to yourself “I Love You, I’m Sorry, Please Forgive Me, Thank You.” Then, see how you feel. Most likely, you’ll immediately be lighter, more open, and relaxed. Continue to repeat the phrases until any negative or heavy feelings have dissipated.

When we learn to take full responsibility for our part in any situation, understanding that it always takes two to tango, we evolve and grow into stronger, more enlightened, and happier human beings. In essence, you’re saying “I’m sorry for my part in this” and “Please forgive me for whatever role I played in the situation.” It also takes us from victim to victor.

Practice using this amazing healing technique in your day to day life. In fact, commit to trying it for one week on everything that feels out of alignment and see what happens. Chances are you’ll begin to notice some very significant shifts in all areas of your life!

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

Surrender – The Ultimate Test of Faith

Surrender – The Ultimate Test of Faith

Many of us have read self-help books that talk about surrendering and letting go as a way of de-stressing and stopping our need to control every aspect of life. By digging deep and finding an inner faith that everything will be okay, we are more able to relax and live with joy and ease.

Sometimes, this is easier said than done. Especially if you’ve explored the law of attraction like I have, which teaches us that thoughts become things, therefore often causing us added pressure to keep our mind aligned and disciplined.  Ironically, this takes us further away from simply letting go.

Then what is true surrender? How can we incorporate it into our lives so that it isn’t just a theory but an actual way of being?

For me, it has taken years to truly understand letting go and trusting. It’s easy for us to doubt ourselves or to question whether or not we are on the right path or if we’ve made smart choices along the way.

But here are some simple ways to open up to a more surrendered life. Practice these and you’ll be well on your way to a serene and happy way of being:

  • Look Back– If you’re stressed or worried about a particular area of your life, just look back onto past events that brought you similar angst and recall what the outcome was. Most often, it ended positively without major drama. We mostly fear things that will never come to fruition so with each similar experience that pops up, we should be able to let go more each time without anticipating the worst. Practice makes perfect. Be careful not to spend too much time in the past however, as it can rehash stuff that no longer serves us.
  • Stop Planning – Most people need to set goals and make plans to stay on track. This isn’t a bad idea but be careful not to spend too much time focused on future events or we miss the magic of today. Work on setting intentions and visions for your future but then let go fully and completely. Have faith that the Universe has heard your wishes and that it doesn’t need constant reminders in order to fulfill those very things. Again, trust and let go.
  • Create Space– Each of us requires daily, quiet, reflective time. We need to go inward and tune in to what that quiet voice of intuition is telling us. When we can get still and learn to trust our gut reactions, we will begin to rely on it as our friendly confidant that never steers us wrong. Start focusing more on living from a still and centered way of being rather than from one of analysis. Create mental and spiritual space within.
  • Stop Reacting– There comes a time in our life when we must stop being a victim, reacting to our life’s events. What if there was a higher power guiding us and it had more wisdom than we did? What if we could totally let go and be led somewhere far greater than we even imagined? Stress begets stress. Let’s work on reacting less and easing into whatever is happening in this moment with trust and faith.
  • Calming Herbs – Most of us are programmed from a young age to look at the worst case scenario. This intensifies our fight or flight reactions causing only more upset. Try herbs like Ashwaganda, Rhodiola, and Maca to boost energy while lowering the stress hormone cortisol. Chamomile, Kava kava, Valerian, and Lemon Balm along with Sun Theanine and Gamma Amino Butyric (GABA) also work very well to soothe the body and mind and lessen anxiety.
  • Have Fun – When we can remember to enjoy life, celebrate with friends, and do things that feed our inner child, we immediately begin to let go and live more in the moment. When we are fully present, we are totally surrendered. Having fun and planning outings each week will absolutely help you to relax, release, and regain balance.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.om

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

Sanity Guide for the Self-Employed

Sanity Guide for the Self-Employed

If you work for yourself, you understand that although it offers an exciting and independent opportunity, it isn’t always what we dreamed it would be.

Being self-motivated and accountable for your own actions is not easy and when the going gets tough, sometimes it’s easy to take a nap, grab a coffee with friends, or simply do nothing at all. And while it is certainly okay to let yourself off the hook at times, we also need incredible discipline and motivation to build our business. Having no structure and working solo is hard. All humans thrive on interaction and a social setting and extended periods of being in isolation can take its toll.

I know this all too well. I’ve been working for myself for well over a decade. Actually, there have only been a few times in my life that I actually had a job. I have thrived and I have lost my way. With any endeavor you’ll probably experience both sides of the coin too. If you’ve been fortunate enough to have ongoing success, then you have discovered the winning combination of hard work, great service, an important product, and possibly, ideal timing. But, if you find yourself in a lull or questioning your choices, just know that you aren’t alone.

Constantly re-creating yourself or your business along with ongoing self-promotion takes A LOT of energy. For example, remaining on social media for hours just to bring awareness to your mission can be exhausting and is quite different than being there to connect with old friends.

Here are some things that you may want to consider if you’re in the middle of a self-employed career crisis:

  • Hire a Coach– Sometimes we need assistance. Consider bringing in an expert who can guide you through your next steps. A professional coach can help you to re-evaluate and come up with a new plan for your career and your life.
  • Get a Job– To the entrepreneur, this seems like the ultimate failure, but there is nothing wrong with getting a job. Even a part time, new career can break up the monotony of your day-to-day routine. Creating a different setting, fresh energy, and new people along with having a place to go everyday especially if you work from home, may be exactly what you need. It doesn’t mean that you’re giving up. In fact, it may spark new ideas and creativity that has been missing in your business.
  • Less Can Be More– When you’re self-employed, taking time off to do something fun often instills guilt. Thoughts like “ but I need more clients” or “I haven’t made my numbers” come to mind and even when we do create down time, often we don’t enjoy it fully. Begin allowing yourself to let go and work less with more leisure time. You may be surprised at the new leads and opportunities that come from putting yourself out there socially, especially with a renewed sense of ease and openness.
  • Change it Up– If things get too monotonous in our life, it may be time for a change. Perhaps it’s time to move homes, take up a hobby, or have a short weekend getaway to re-fuel. Shaking things up in our life from our morning routine, to our living situation or the gym we go to each day, can help us to look at the world through new eyes. We all become creatures of habit so maybe it’s time to change it up!
  • Move On– If you’ve been working, striving, and pushing to make things happen, and if you’ve considered the previous steps to no avail, then maybe it’s time to move on. While giving up your self-employed dreams can feel heart-breaking, it may be exactly what you need to bring in new energy which can totally transform your life! What if your focus and tenacity at work has been blocking new love or an exciting collaboration that is better than you envisioned? Remember, the Universe always has your back. Letting go of the old or outmoded way of being and opening up to a place of less resistance may be precisely what will bring you even more joy, fulfillment, and prosperity than you ever imagined.

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Coach Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!

 

 

And The Oscar Goes To…

And The Oscar Goes To…

You may be curious as to why I’d write about the Oscars in a wellness section of City Watch LA. One might think that the Hollywood scene is all about money, power, outer appearances, and a fake double kiss on the cheek with the right connections.

But after watching closely, I got a very different sense of that world. It may be partly due to the recent “me too” movement but it feels as if the heart of the business has shifted. I became keenly aware of an underlying significance at the core of each speech, to follow your dreams.

Year after year, I find myself getting emotional throughout the Oscars. Part of me feels excited and inspired by what the actors and the movies are portraying yet there is also sadness, a feeling that I am missing out. It’s not that I want to be a celebrity actor but rather, I want to have a larger, starring role in my own life. Viewing the Oscars always reminds me that I can reach higher and dream bigger than I imagined.

If you listen closely to each of the winners, their speeches are filled with thanks for those who have helped them along the way. There is a great deal of humility and gratitude that comes across for receiving such an honor. Even deeper than that, there is a message of hope. “Do not give up on your dreams” says one actor, “don’t let anybody tell you that you can’t” says another. And on and on the inspiration goes.

Underneath all of the elegant gowns and tailored tuxedos, designer jewelry, cameras, lights, and fame, comes a message of courage, faith, and hopefulness. Through all of the glitz and glam is a grassroots, heart-warming story of achieving dreams and reaching a goal that seemed impossible to many.

Whether you’re a single parent, electrician, esthetician, or athlete, and no matter what your age, dreams are what keep us going. Faith that we are on the right path and serving our highest and best mission is the fuel that helps us focus. On those days when we feel like quitting and our inner spark is on the verge of going out, dreams light the way for a better life.

You may not aspire for an Oscar or even to be in the public eye but we all have a unique and awesome purpose. It’s up to each one of us to discover that mission and then go about our life sharing it with others. Our ultimate undertaking is to leave the world a better place because we lived.

Most of us won’t receive an Oscar but we can begin playing a bigger role in our own lives. We can star in the story of our life like nobody else can. We can use our unique talents and abilities and become more present, giving, and open. Then we can listen to those around us who send us praise, thanks, and appreciation for all that we have done for them; accolades that are well deserved and far more important than any trophy.

Whether it be touching the lives of millions or simply one. We ARE making a difference! We ARE here for a reason and your dreams exist to keep you on track, constantly moving you forward while expanding and growing. Never give up and don’t ever underemphasize what is possible in the screenplay of your life.

And the Oscar goes to…YOU!

 

Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert and a Transformational Breath Healer Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com

He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!