Every one of us has made new year’s resolutions at some point in our lives. Many of us have kept them but all too often, let’s face it, they’re left behind somewhere by February or March because we’re too busy and have lost the incentive to follow through.
But what’s really going on below the surface is that our subconscious mind is sabotaging our success. Whether we want to lose 10 pounds, earn more money, spend less, or meet the mate of our dreams, what we desire in our conscious minds means very little if our subconscious is running the show.
We get messages early on in our lives about important topics such as money, love, and sex for example. We’re taught by our parents and other influential adults how to navigate these areas of our life. We learn by example and what we see and hear sets up these beliefs at an early age. It ends up that no matter what we want on the outside as grown-ups, these often-limiting attitudes take over causing continual broken dreams and disappointments.
So, how can we stop this from happening once and for all? How can we finally keep our resolutions instead of hitting the wall yet again and feeling the ongoing sense of failure and frustration?
Get to the Bottom of it – For each resolution, make a list of the top 5 negative thoughts that come to mind. For example, if you’d like to earn and save more money, journal about your feelings on the topic such as “if I make additional income, I’ll have to work harder and never see my friends” or “if I budget, then I’ll constantly be stressed and anxious and not enjoy my life.” Whatever comes up, it is time to get it out and into the open for healing. Write down the contradictory feelings on each topic that are getting in the way.
Seek Help – Once you’ve uncovered your subconscious beliefs that are blocking your forward movement, seek an expert who can help. Find a therapist, hypnotist, healer, or coach who can help you move through these old, unhealthy patterns in order to let them go once and for all. Change is possible! Make this the year that you finally break free.
Make a Plan – If you set goals for the new year then you must also make a plan. Nothing will get accomplished if you just wish for it. It doesn’t need to be an overwhelming process but you must work backwards from your long-term goal or resolution, breaking it up into smaller and more achievable steps. Start with the outcome you’d like in one year and then create actions for the month, week, and each day in order to succeed.
Be Accountable – Make sure to check in regularly. How far are you coming along with your goals? Find somebody who you can be accountable to, perhaps an accountability partner who is also looking to keep their resolutions. Set up regular weekly or monthly meetings and do it as a team. If you’ve bitten off more than you can chew, go back and re-evaluate and perhaps set more attainable steps for you to take.
Celebrate Your Wins – Take time to celebrate your accomplishments! Too many times we sail through our successes without truly acknowledging and appreciating them. When we have big goals it’s easy to overlook the small wins along the way. Give thanks, soak in the gratitude, and be more present to enjoy even the smallest of victories.
Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert Living in Los Angeles. http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com
He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!
While I’m no fortune teller and can’t guarantee what the future holds, one thing is pretty clear; how we feel today is a good indication of what is to come in the future. Our emotions act as our internal GPS or guidance system as to our final destination.
For years there have been books and speakers touting the power of the law of attraction and quantum physics. What we think about long enough becomes our reality. To make this even more clear, I believe it is what we feel that attracts the strongest and those emotions then create our thoughts. Often this can be a down-right scary concept for those who deal with ongoing depression, negativity, worry, sadness, or fear-based thinking. Talk about bringing us even more to worry about!
It is often suggested by many experts that we simply choose a different thought. Snap out of it basically and choose differently. If only it were that easy.
Some days when everything is going well and we’re happy and rested, feeling good comes as second nature. But what about those days where we feel lethargic, heavy, or we’re dealing with a scary or painful event? What then?
As somebody who deals with depression and anxiety myself, I know first-hand that it isn’t always easy. And if we’ve been stuck in the same cycle for years, it can be difficult to find the inner faith or belief that things will ever change.
But here are some practical tools to begin implementing into your life so that you can “snap out of it” and move into a more positive frame of mind and emotional space.
- SAY THANK YOU – When your life feels down and out, finding things to be grateful for can be hard. But this is exactly what we need to do. We are responsible to train our minds and focus on the positive. By writing down a minimum of 5 things that you’re grateful for each morning, you will notice a renewed sense of optimism that you didn’t feel before. No matter what is going on in your life, you can find 5 things that you’re thankful for. Start small and be consistent even on the days when you feel good. This regular practice will eventually begin re-programming your inner dialogue.
- GET CREATIVE – Find something that feeds your soul and makes you feel good. Often, we literally have to push ourselves to do something fun! What is it for you? Did you give up on your painting or singing or dancing years ago because you were busy or it was too expensive? What’s missing in your life? What truly makes your heart sing? What energizes you? Once you answer then commit to making it happen. Don’t let the need to be perfect stop you from enjoying the pleasure of a creative task.
- START DREAMING AGAIN – I for one gave up on my dreams this year. I got very practical and thought “why bother.” Sometimes the pain of not achieving what we want kills our spark. I dare you to start dreaming again. What the heck do you want to do in life? What is your biggest and most outrageous vision for your future? The one that you’re afraid to voice for fear of sounding crazy. Yes, that one. Bring it back into the forefront of your mind and feel deeply the emotions that it brings up when you meditate and visualize its outcome. Do it daily and see how quickly the Universe responds to bring you the right people, circumstances, and events to make it happen.
- FIND A HEALER – Sometimes we are so blocked that nothing seems to help. This is a time to hire somebody to assist you. Often you’ll need to experiment to find the right fit. Try hypnosis, Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), talk therapy, Reiki, life coaching…something! Don’t just wallow in your unhappiness, do something about it once and for all. If you continue to do what you’ve always done, you’ll continue to get what you’ve always gotten. Shake things up and decide today that YOU WILL MOVE THROUGH THIS no matter what!
- GET INSPIRED – Nothing helps you out of a slump more than reading an uplifting book or listening to an inspiring audio during your drive. Go and see a live performance or visit the art gallery. We all need to be reminded of this stuff and nobody walks around permanently happy and optimistic. It takes work. Re-charge your spiritual, creative, and emotional batteries daily. Not once per week but daily. If you want to change your future, you’ll need this more than ever.
None of us are in this alone. We all get down at times and sometimes we remain there for far too long. If we can just get our good days to outweigh the bad, we WILL begin to see a positive shift in our life. Uplifting events and people will be drawn to us like magnets. The better it gets, the better it gets.
As my shaman reminds me often, “it’s okay to be okay” but in this case, I am suggesting to you that “it’s okay to be GREAT!” You have permission to be happy, to shine, to thrive, and to live the life that you truly dream of.
Jay Bradley is a Youthful Aging, Wellness & Lifestyle Expert Living in Los Angeles. For More About Jay and to Book a Wellness Coaching Session, go to: http://www.JayBradleyLifestyle.com
He is the Best-Selling Author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger & Feel Better!
As a certified wellness coach CWC I’ve worked with people all over the world to help them achieve a healthier and happier balance between their body, mind, and spirit. My goal is to dig in, find out where they’re off balance, and then session by session, work to assist my clients in regaining and rediscovering a new way of living that better fits their goals.
Many of them want to lose weight, increase physical energy, or look and feel younger. While all of these are important, we come to realize as we work together that it is what’s inside that counts the most. We learn, as a team, that true balance, happiness, and wellness is ALWAYS an inside job.
If we look at quantum physics and the study of matter, we know that everything in life including the computer or phone that you’re reading this on, is in fact, energy. In essence all “things” are simply molecules bouncing around.
When we look at our physical body and our level of health for example, these too are made up of energy. The question then becomes, what gets our energy moving in a positive direction? The answer is our thoughts and emotions. Thoughts are the basis of everything that we desire. Past thoughts have created the life that we are living today and if we want to know where we’ll be in a week, month, or year from now, we need only look at today’s thoughts and inner feelings. By doing this we’ll know without much doubt what is to come.
All experiences in our present moment can be pinpointed to thoughts and beliefs that we had a week, month, or years ago. So in order to make changes in our life and improve our health, we must change our self-defeating thoughts. When we take more control and become the change that we want to see from the inside out, it’s a very empowering way to live.
This can also be one of the most challenging aspects of our journey. Many of our thoughts and beliefs are habitual and unconscious and it can be difficult to change the ones that have been with us since childhood…difficult but not impossible.
If we are dealing with a health crisis it can take even more strength and discipline to tap into that positive vibration of total healing within us. But the more we begin to catch our negative or self-defeating patterns, fears, and negative dialogue and then immediately changing them into positives, the quicker we experience shifts for the better.
Creating a morning practice that involves journaling, meditation, quiet reflection, and reading uplifting books is the beginning of putting your inner self first. When we carve out this time we begin to make our emotional and spiritual life a priority and this is where the magic begins. When we turn inward and pay attention to that quiet voice of intuition within us and we begin to get conscious of our thoughts, the right people, circumstances, and opportunities begin to show up almost effortlessly and our health often begins to improve. The ideal healer, doctor, coach, or specialist will appear with synchronicity to help speed the process along.
As I have learned in my life and through the experiences of my clients, ANYTHING is possible and change IS attainable once we begin to do the inner work of releasing negativity, fear, and limiting thoughts. When we work from the inside out and then the outside in, we have a recipe for true success in all areas. It doesn’t always happen over night but it is quite possibly the most important priority that we will ever make.
Jay Bradley is an Anti-Aging, Wellness, and Lifestyle Coach living in Los Angeles.
He is the author of LIVE LOOK FEEL, The 12-Week Guide to Live Longer, Look Younger, and Feel Better!